I went to Cincinnati this week. I got there Sunday night around 12midnight and left Tuesday morning. Monica, don't hate me.. I know I didn't call. I hadn't saved your number in my phone. Next time, you will have a primo position on my agenda, I promise. Wow... you know what? That was super presumptuous of me! Monica may have just thrown her head back, let out a big sigh and with a giddy smile said, "Thank you, Lord, for deleting my number out of Caitie's phone!" Hell, she might not even read this! I am so conceited! And yet... the crazy thing is, the fact that I pointed out my own egotistical thoughts might be an indication of how humble I am! Ah, the ongoing debate on everyone's minds!
Speaking of crazy and ongoing debates, Ms. Clinton is in town! Who wants to scour Lafayette, looking for Hilary, so we can push her into a hotel pool?? C'mon! As I was driving over the Wabash, covering my mouth and nose so as not to give the Lafayette air any room for victory (we currently have a competition going.. if I can get from downtown Lafayette to my apartment without dry-heaving, I win! If I gag, the West Lafayette Department of Sanitation wins. So far, we're 5-46. Fingers crossed that I can bring my score up. I've tried covering my entire face with a Snuggle dryer sheet, but I got lightheaded. Anyway, I hope Hilary enjoyed a strong Lafayette breeze today.), I saw that there was a line of people, 5 adults thick, that wound down the depot steps, past the Lafayette Savings Bank bank, and around the corner, ending about a fourth of the way across the bridge! Who are these people? I really wanted to attend, protesting quietly with a quick-witted sign that would have made everyone second guess their undying support! I can see it now.. people would notice my sign and while reading, cock their heads to one side, stop listening to Hilary and start nodding in agreement with my witty remark about how irrelevant it is to talk about health-care or education costs when 1/2 the population is/will be missing!
While my mom was getting ready for the Blue Knight Auction, someone called from the Obama campaign. My mom made a kind but firm explanation for our non-support, but part of me wanted to get on the phone and ask the person questions. Not about Barack's campaign but about where they're calling from, if they have one of those scripts in front of them and if Obama provided his campaign staff with dinner while they made hundreds of random phone calls. The logistics of campaigns are fascinating to me and sometimes I just want a glimpse into the political world at that level.
Anyway, the reason I visited Cincinnati to assist my cousin. She's 18, a senior at an all-girls high school and was voted onto prom court! She has never been to a dance before; it's just not her scene. So, as she is basically being forced to attend, she's a little nervous and asked me to come down to help her find a dress since the prom is this Friday. I was glad to help but now I'm thinking that I should have stayed home. I have so much to do and I'm so behind on all the day-to-day crap-ola that needs to be done.. It was relaxing tho and fun to spend time with my family! :)
One of the things I need to take care of is our toilet. I think I need to call maintenance, because it has been running for days.. We don't pay water, otherwise I would have called before I left for Cincinnati (go green!), but the chain keeps coming off the little hooky thing and last week I had to wrap my entire arm in plastic wrap (I'm not kidding) and stick my hand down the back of the toilet to re-attach it! If you were outside the bathroom, you would have heard this.. "Alright.. here we go! Ehhh.... Ewwww EWWW!!! Ah! Ehh... DAMMIT, where's the f-ing... AHHHH!!! EWW EWW EWW!!" (That's verbatim.) Hmmm... makes you wonder what the hell is going on in West Lafayette. The air smells like shit and our toilet is running away like Hilary Clinton at St. B's Oktoberfest. Is there some kind of poop strike going on? Well, I'll tell you what; my own toilet is as far as I will take things into my own (plastic wrap covered) hands, and even then --I'll still dry heave! I haven't made phone calls yet, but I think I'll start tomorrow before Sanitation hits 50 points... This is ridiculous!
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9 comments:
SO SO SO TRUE!!!!!!! Seriously, why doesn't this city do something about the sh*t plant (as John likes to call it)... it has to be killing Purdue--if I were a mom bringing my kid here to tour the college, I think I'd either consciously or subconsciously get a bad impression... not to mention people visiting for academic or professional purposes.... but you're right... I hope some of those Reilly plaza people caught the "nice" breeze from the West side! lol
So your cousin goes to St. Ursula's? I'm not offended, by the way. Will you be able to come up for the Reds game with the rest of the gang on the 7th?
And the whole town smells. This is something I wouldn't admit to myself while I lived there. Between Staley's, the river, and the effing ginko trees on campus, the whole town smells like a toilet.
One of your best post yet. Had me rolling the whole time.
She goes to Ursuline actually.. Why someone couldn't have come up with another name that wasn't so close to Ursula is beyond me!
No, I cannot come up on the 7th.. but I'll see you at the wedding right???
Thanks for finally pointing out the stink!! I've been meaning to post my own thoughts on this topic for some time and keep forgetting. But you said everything much better than I could have anyway! UGH!! And Monica--the gingko trees!!! BARF!! There was one directly outside the door of the shop where I worked on Main Street, and people would track those poopy berries into to store on their shoes... ugh. It was disgusting. You're right--our town does smell like a toilet.
You definitely KNOW when you enter Lafayette. Some people say that Tate and Lyle's smells good.... I beg to differ. However, I much prefer that to the Sanitation mess that's going on in WLaf. We should file formal protests...
Whenever Joy comes into she steps out of her car, takes a deep breath and says, "Aaahh...Lafayette!"
town*
I agree with you girls!! If you were ever kidnapped, blindfolded and taken into hiding in Lafayette, it wouldn't work because, even blindfolded, you could be like, "Ummm.. (Sniff, sniff) okay. We're driving past Staley's.... Now we're taking a left onto Main. No! Columbia!." Haha The kidnappers would be like, "Dammit! Just get out!" And, still blindfolded, you'd be like, "(Sniff, sniff) Should I get out in front of Java Roaster or Chumley's?"
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